The Day Off
by UniversalOverlordess
Summary: BelxFran Because Xanxus and Squalo were having a 'moment', the Varia have the day off. For Fran, this day includes a high speed car chase, the burning of restaurants, and kissing. Yeah, he's confused about the last one too...


I'm baack!

-cue horror movie soundtrack-

This popped into my head and it wouldn't leave, so...here it is. Again, it is BelxFran because a) BelxFran is awesome, b) I wanted it to be, and c)...there is no c, but stopping at b felt kind of weird. 0.o

Don't forget the r's! : reduse, reuse, recycle, repossess, re-energize, and, most importantly: review!

**Disclaimer**: My piggy bank is full of money that I am using to buy KHR. ...but until that fateful day, I do not own it.

* * *

Over the hills, through the woods, through the flower patch, across the swamp, into the city, across the street and around the corner there was a park. Many insignificant people walked this park and played in it. Children ran, laughed and played on the playground while their parents walked with one another…unless you were like the couple that were currently making out behind the bush. Lovers met up in this park to have romantic picnics and lunch dates. On this particular day there were four couples lounging on the grass (not including the one making out behind the bush), seven or so families enjoying their time together, a group of teenagers skipping school and playing pranks on the other inhabitants of the park, and an elderly couple taking a stroll with their grandchild.

The child was laughing happily but he stopped with his eyes spotted someone by the trees. "Look, Grandma," he screeched. "Look at the funny frog-boy!"

His grandma took his hand and hastily pulled him away from the 'frog-boy' with a sign around his neck. "That's nice dear. He's a very sad person…"

From where he was standing by the tree with the big sign that read _If you pay me money I'll hug you_ Fran gave out a long sigh.

"Senpai," he stated, very bored. "Why am I standing here with this sign?" He aimed his question at the branch a few feet above him. "This is stupid."

A knife to his head was his response. "Ushishishi. Stupid Froggy, the Prince is bored. That is why you are holding the sign."

Fran looked down at the sign with utter distaste. "The last time we did this I needed extensive therapy sessions."

Bel laughed. "Which is why I changed the sign. It says hug instead of play. It was smart of me."

Fran rolled his eyes. "It was stupid of you." He moved slightly to the side to dodge the knife that came zooming at him. "Stupid senpai."

Bel jumped down from the tree and leaned his arm on his kouhai's hat. "Ushishishi. The Prince is hungry. I'm going to go and get food worthy of the Prince."

"Get me something as well-"

_Stab._

"-or not." He watched as his senpai walked off in the opposite direction. With an irritated sigh Fran took the four knives out of his hat and hung the sign on a low branch. Then, with interest, he wandered aimlessly over to the playground. Two kids were building a sandcastle in the sand, laughing and throwing sand at each other. As Fran looked at them he felt the urge to smile. He fought it down.

Childhood innocence. What had ever happened to his?

_Oh yeah, I met stupid Pineapple Head and was trained to be an assassin and illusionist for a mafia. Plus there was the bonus that my family dumped me at some shelter as a baby, I was experimented on by the government and now I can't feel pain. And I ask what had happened to my childhood innocence…_

He wandered over to the swing-set on the playground and sat down on an unoccupied on. _Today is very boring…_ he mused. He and Bel were only at the park because of the stupid long-haired captain and their boss.

_Flashback…_

"VOI! The boss said he wants all of you out of the building! Consider it your very first day off!"

Fran, Bel, Lussuria and Levi all turned to stare at Squalo, who was standing at the base of the stares, Xanxus right behind him. Xanxus glared at them when they continued to stare. "You didn't tell them hard enough, you piece of scum."

Squalo turned to their boss. "Voi!! Are you trying to imply something here?"

Xanxus stood up straighter…if that was even possible. "I'm implying that you're a piece of scum!"

Fran raised his hand hesitantly. "Are you two having a moment?"

"OUT!"

_End flashback…_

A tug on his leg drew Fran out of his reverie. A small boy was pulling on his pant leg, staring up at him with wide eyes. Fran pulled his head back just a little. "Who are you?"

"Are you okay, Mister?"

Frank blinked. "Huh?"

"You have a frog growing on your head. It must hurt." For emphasis, the boy pointed to the frog hat that was perched happily on the illusionists head.

Fran looked up at the hat, going cross-eyed in the process. _I hate this stupid thing._ "It's not a real frog. It's a hat."

A smile appeared on the boy's face. "A hat! Can I wear it?" His eyes were pleading, and Fran found himself unable to look away.

_How can I say no to that? Bel-senpai will most likely kill me for taking off his 'precious hat' but…I can't resist!_ He slowly reached up and lifted the hat off of his head.

_Somewhere…with food fit for a Prince…_

Bel stopped eating the sandwich he had bought. His 'Kouhai-took-off-his-hat' senses were tingling. _That kid is dead._

_With Fran, who didn't know how much trouble he was going to be in when his senpai eventually got a hold of him…_

Fran leaned down and placed the frog hat on the boy's head; the hat slipped down to the child's neck. The boy laughed and began running in different directions, screaming, "I'm a frog!"

Fran hid a laugh and went back to staring at the sky-

-or at least he tried to, but four teenagers had gathered around him and were doing fine jobs at being doors instead of windows. Fran's eyebrows furrowed. "Could you move?"

Three of the four laughed while the fourth (who had black hair and green eyes…but his appearance doesn't really matter much) stepped closer to Fran. "It's unusual to see a girl like you around this part of town. Where are you from, sweetie?"

This guy had just made a mistake. In fact, he had made three:

One, he had called Fran a girl. The last person to do that had been found five weeks later, and a forensic anthropologist had to be called in to identify the body.

Two, he had called Fran 'sweetie'. The last person to do that had been found seven weeks later, and a special government team had been called on the case (the case was now officially closed, due to the members of the team being killed off, one by one, by burning).

Three, he had approached something that belong to Prince the Ripper, but Fran and the unfortunate soul hadn't known about that one.

"Excuse me?"

The leader of the group leaned down and pressed a light kiss to Fran's cheek. "A pretty thing like you shouldn't be out here all alone. Someone could sweep you up and steal you away-"

The wind was suddenly knocked out of him as Fran ran his fist into the creep's stomach. "One, it's the middle of the day. Two, I'm in a park. Three, why would I be interested in you? And four, I'm a _boy_." And with that Fran stood up and began making his way over to the boy who had his hat. After depositing the hat back on his head he began walking towards the side walk, but before he made it he stopped by a mother and tapped her on her shoulder. "Your son is eating sand," he told her.

She looked up, gasped and ran to her child, yelling, "Joey, spit that out right now!"

With a sigh and a thought of _this day sucks_, Fran went about his merry way.

Without the knowledge of what was to come.

_One hour later..._

Fran was lost. He was most definitely lost. He had never been to this side of the city before and thought that this would be his chance to explore it. What he didn't count on was having his map stolen by a hobo, his left shoe being stolen by another hobo, or him being hit on by a different hobo (1). _Perhaps I should turn back. And find Bel-senpai…scratch that. I don't need that stupid fake prince's help._

He was walking by a store with a television in its window when something on the T.V caught his attention.

"…the police are still in pursuit of the car, believing that the one driving it to be the one who killed the four university students. The four students' names are-"

The announcer kept talking, but Fran's eyes were drawn to the upper corner of the television, where a single car was being chased by five police cars. The driver of the lone car was blond, and Fran could make out a tiara on the head. _No. Way._

He was still staring when there was a honk and a call of "Froggy!"

He turned in time to see a purple car pull up next to him. Bel leaned out of the window. "Ushishishi. Hop in Froggy."

"What if I don't want to?

_Stab._

"Fine."

* * *

Has someone told him when he was a little boy that one day he would be involved in a high speed chase on the freeway with someone that he called 'senpai' he would have done something horrible to them. Something horrible that involved a jack hammer. Fran had a small weakness for jack hammers. But now, as he sat in the passenger seat of a stolen vehicle with his crazy senpai, he wondered why it had taken this long for this one event to actually happen. _I should have known it would have eventually. All mafia stories have at least one high speed chase in it._

Bel gripped the wheel in one hand and casually pressed harder on the gas pedal, pushing the car to 140 miles an hour. "Ushishishi. The Prince forgot to get the frog food. The Prince is feeling generous and has decided that he will take Froggy out. But Froggy will pay, of course."

"Of course I will pay…" Fran huffed. "Stupid fake prince."

Bel leaned over and casually stuck a knife into his kouhai. "The Prince doesn't pay for peasants."

"That's because the 'prince' is broke."

_Stab. _"Ushishishi. Stupid frog."

"Stupid senpai."

* * *

Bel had chosen an Italian restaurant. It was an odd choice, seeing as how Fran had never seen Bel so much as taste any kind of Italian food. Fran, who already knew what he was ordering, took this time to study his senpai. The blond was staring (maybe, Fran couldn't tell) intently at the menu, a frown on his face. _Uh, oh. _

"They don't have any burgers."

Burgers. His senpai wanted burgers at an Italian restaurant.

"Ushishishi. They better have burgers, because that is what the Prince wants."

Fran mentally groaned and brought his hands to his face, hoping beyond all hope that the restaurant had insanely good insurance. And that the restaurant gave its employees _very_ good health insurance. Bel raised his hand and summoned their waiter. "Do you have burgers?"

The waiter's smile slipped a little. Burgers? "No, we don't serve burgers here. But we do have an excellent fettuccini alfredo, with Italian sausage and-"

Bel's smile appeared, and Fran made a mental note of all of the possible emergency exit routes. "But that is not what the Prince wants."

The waiter stared at the blond. "I'm sorry, sir, but we do not serve burgers. If you want the beef, then may I recommend the-"

The five o'clock news would later report of the famous Italian restaurant, Rafael, being burned to the ground and of two males escaping, one blond with a tiara on his head, and another with teal hair and a giant frog hat.

* * *

"Ushishishi. What better way to end the day is there than with fireworks?"

Fran turned to stare at his senpai like he was insane. "You call blowing up a factory and watching it burn 'fireworks'?"

"Ushishishi. Froggy just doesn't appreciate the finer forms of art."

Fran turned back to the 'fireworks'. "You're insane; you belong in an asylum."

He expected to be stabbed, not for his senpai to be silent. A silent Bel was scarier than one throwing knives. "Senpai?"

The grip on his hair was unexpected, the forcing of his head to turn to the left was unexpected, the pressing of lips on his was most _definitely _unexpected. He gave out a muffled 'th' fu?' which, unfortunately, allowed Bel to stick his tongue inside Fran's mouth. He almost yelped when his tongue was bitten harshly; he felt blood, but then Bel was there, lapping it up while continuing his forced kiss. When his senpai pulled away Fran could have sworn that there was a smile (not a smirk, not a grin, not an 'I'm-going–to-kill-you-and-you-don't-even-know-it' smirk, but a _smile_) on Bel's face.

"Ushishishi. Now _that_ was the way to end the day! The Prince is _very _happy." He leaned over, gave Fran one more wet kiss (complete with the sucking of blood), and then stood up. "I'll see you tomorrow Froggy." And then he was gone, leaving behind one very confused kouhai.

Fran stared after him. _The hell?_

* * *

Mary was packing up for the day when there was a knock on her door. "Yes?"

Her assistant opened the door a bit. "I'm sorry, ma'am, but there is a boy out here who says he desperately needs to see you…" Her assistant was biting her lip, and Mary held back a chuckle.

"Alright, send him in. I can spare a few minutes." She sat back down at her desk and opened up her note book. She was grabbing her nearest pen when the door opened again. "Hello, how may I he-"

She froze as her eyes settled on the boy. _Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no, no, no! Why me? Who did I piss off so bad that it _had_ to be me?_ Gulping, she resigned herself to her fate and faced her next case. "What was it this time?" She asked tiredly, groping around her cabinet to find the binder for this _special _client. When she had it she put it down on her desk, cringing when her desk shook and threatened to break. That binder weighed almost one hundred pounds; she'd weighed it herself.

Fran sat down on the couch. "He kissed me. Twice. With his tongue. He also bit my tongue, twice, and drank my blood."

Mary sighed, making a mental note to call her husband and have him cancel their diner reservations. This was going to be a long one…

* * *

1: readers will please note that the author has nothing against hobos...

Aaaand there it is!

I'm still petitioning the Saving of the Stars! Review and they will live longer. Fran loves the stars, so you should too. But, I'll throw in a bonus: if you review, you can get a Varia plushie! You choose the Varia member you want and I will write it to you! -The Bel plushie comes complete with the trademark 'Ushishishi' laugh. Fran comes with the 'Senpaaai' whine-

UO


End file.
